Our Anniversity*

No, we haven't become vandals, but what a happy coincidence
to find this on May 31st.

Jon and I had a talk a few weeks before our anniversary. "Is there anything special you'd like?" we asked each other. We paused to think about it. "Let's not make it about stuff," I suggested. Of course, Jon agreed, and we decided to take a family hike in honor of our anniversary.

As the date got closer, though, we were torn. Our neighborhood pool had reopened for the summer, and we remembered with such fondness our family swims from last summer. The pool offers free admission on Sundays from 11-12:30, which has come to be known as "Heathen Swim" among our friends. The pool is located in the same park as the handball courts we began frequenting a few months ago. A morning of free, wholesome family recreation, all within easy biking distance, seemed hard to pass up.

Although we had decided against gifts, on the morning of May 31st, Jon made one of my dreams come true. One of my favorite childhood memories is picking black raspberries from the bushes outside our house. I remember trying to avoid the prickers, dreaming of going inside with a full bowl, while most berries went directly into my mouth. It's a strong endless-childhood-summer association, like splashing with the neighbors in our backyard pool, and playing flashlight tag in the dusk.

Our kids will have similar memories, perhaps,
but of collecting mulberries from the trees in the irrigation ditch.

Mostly, I remember the special flavor of black raspberries, but since you can't buy them in a store, and our previous attempts at growing them were unsuccessful, I had resigned myself to the fact that I'd probably never taste one again. But on our anniversary morning, Jon whispered that I should go check the "berry patch." Not one to give up easily, Jon had purchased more black raspberry plants this year, planted them in containers, and placed them around our garden, in varying degrees of shade. Miraculously, one plant had six berries. And an even greater miracle occurred- Zephyr and Jubilee left them alone! I savored each precious berry, with thankfulness to my husband for his perseverance and his desire to realize my heart's desire. I wish everyone had a Jon.

We packed racquets, water, snacks, balls, sunscreen, towels, and bathing suits and biked over to the park. I can't say exactly what we play over there. The courts, I believe, are technically for handball, as they are three sided. We use tennis balls and racquets, but the game looks more like racquetball. I played a bit in college and beyond, but Jon is new to the sport. We get in a good volley when we can, but there are challenges- with no ceiling, the ball occasionally flies up and over the back wall and into the adjacent ditch. And while we encourage the kids to keep busy in the neighboring court, they frequently wander into ours, and it's hard to really go for that backhand when it might smack our offspring in the head. Also, it gets pretty hot this time of year, and we don't go early or late enough to get much shade. Despite the difficulties, we have a great time and enjoy the chance to play together.

Zephyr and Jubilee examining a dead bug at the court.
This was before Jubilee threatened to lick it.

Zephyr manages to work a little TaeKwonDo into our racquetball games.
"Racquetball Jun Be," he'll yell out, and we must assume this position.
"Shee Jak!" he'll holler next, giving the server permission to begin.
(And yes, I have been working out. Thanks for noticing.)

I would have hated hearing this as a child, but boredom
really does inspire creativity.

We had a picnic lunch, changed the kids into their swimsuits, and walked our bikes the short distance to the pool. Two families we're close to are also Heathen Swim regulars, so that made it extra fun.

Ainslie (who intentionally closed her eyes for all three pictures we took,)
Fionna, and Jubes

Fierce. Zephyr and Grady.

A picture of us we didn't have to take ourselves!
(And yes, Jon has been working out. Thanks for noticing.)

After biking home, the kids were predictably exhausted, and their naps gave us a nice chunk of time together. Even though we are together so much as a family, it can be hard to truly feel like we're connecting with all the distractions, mainly, Distraction #1 and Distraction #2.

Jon did plan one more surprise for me, though. Around 3:30 pm, our musically talented (and totally groovy) neighbor Nicole came to our door with her guitar. "Singing telegram!" she announced. "This will just take a minute." Knowing what a diehard Indigo Girls fan I am, "Nicool" wrote a little song for us, to the tune of Closer to Fine. Here are the lyrics:

I'm tryin to tell you somethin bout Nora's life
Maybe give us insight into being Jon's wife
And the best thing he's ever done for her...
Is to give her Jubilee and Zephyr....
and of course the biffy too...yeah

They go to the Farmer's Market
They go to Char and Carrie's
They look to the children
They are happily married

Today is their sixth anniversary
Pointing them to another dawn
And the less she seeks her source for some definitive...
the closer she is to Jon!

Can't you see it? Another musical duo?
Oh, wait, I'd need skills for that. Darn.

But there was still more! We actually awakened the kids from their naps to take them to our friends' house so we could go on a date! We have a long standing, yet somewhat on-again-off-again childcare trade with Mike and Jessica that started right around Zephyr and Conor's first birthdays. When our lives coordinate, we trade datenights every week. It has gotten easier as the kids have gotten older. What luck that it was our turn for a date, and when we saw them at the pool that morning, their evening was free. We had portobello caesar salads and raspberry cake at our favorite restaurant, and did a crossword puzzle. Then, we had time for our annual tradition. Every year we reread our vows to each other. It's nicely reminiscent to repeat those words while looking into each other's eyes, and also gives us the chance to evaluate how we're doing. Do you remember your wedding vows? These are ours, in case you're curious:

I, Nora/Jon
in the name of the spirit that resides in us all,
and in the love that resides within my heart,
take you and you alone,
Jon/Nora
to be my husband/wife and beloved partner.

I promise that I will honor our union with
words of adoration and acts of consideration.
I will bring to our marriage my compassion,
understanding, fairness, and unconditional love.
I commit myself to honor, respect, and believe in you
through the many challenges that lie before us.
I will grow with you, as individuals and as a family,
for the rest of my life.

So far, so good. But I'm thinking perhaps I should start making his coffee one of these days.

With that, we picked up the kids and began our seventh year of marriage. What about that hike, you ask? Stay tuned.

*Blog title comes from our friend Char, who coined the phrase on a card she made for her parents as a very young child.